Cafe Tip Jar (Original)

This is our original cafe tip jar.
The curtsy on our Revised Tip Jar’s a little more straightforward.

Hi, can I take your order?
Can I be of service?
Can I ease your mind as you dissipate precious time?
Am I gentle on your tired eyes?
Name your poison: wine, women, men, theys, song, love pure or otherwise, colors and sounds hurricane-swirling hurting your eyes and ears, a turn on the radio, a spin on the marketing strategy, another skateboard 720ing off the concrete pool lip.

Yes, at the Pure Love Pretend Cafe,
Yes we take your order, we percolate your brew, steep your tea, draw your beer, pour your wine, garnish your liquor, forgive your sins, ask for can we at least all have leniency since we none of us really knew what was going on at any time not really anyhow, scream out about the slings and sins of outrageous confusions, and
we laugh good-natured and bright at your jokes–especially on those rarest of occasions when
they miss
we look into your eyes sharp and clear but not too deep
we say
will that be all? or would you — I could get the desser — yes of course
we say
here’s your bill:
It was only a pretended affair, so there’s no real charge of course
but if you’d like
leave a tip —
In any case, please
Have a nice day
come again
try to understand we mean well
we’ll try to understand you mean well
we’ll try to mean more well and less unwell and the well is always on sale but well, its kind of harsh, so allow me to present our premium shelf


All Content on this Site is Copyright 2018 by Andrew Mackenzie Watson
Disclaimer: You can’t buy or sell Pure Love, and even if you could, you probably shouldn’t.
What is this?: Another hilarious artsy BW/AMW collaboration
What should you do? We dunno, but we hope you’ll let it slide

Repenting of it all: We’ve exceeded ourselves; we’ve misunderstood the nuances; we’ve lost track of our hearts; we repent; we drop it all and beg for the chance to start from 0.