None will deny that Bartleby Willard and Amble Whistletown are world class experts in Pure Love experts; but their expertise has heretofore been almost entirely theoretical in nature.
And what good is that? What good are ideas that don’t actually help real people?
Let’s be fair. They did create a Loving Relationships section in their Love Book, where they discuss what love is, how romantic love works, what faith is, and so on. And they even tried to expand into the business world — whose leaders are always eager to maximize the Pure Love they produce — with a section on Business Ethics. But let’s be fair: no one has ever read any of these writings, and they are not so much objectively verified insights and proven strategies, as some ideas that Bartleby and Amble came up with while considering the issues. Ditto for their prestigious Something Deeperism Institute. That is to say: even their attempts at practical love have been largely theoretical.
Hence this new project. We have brought our men a man. A regular human man. But one with some issues. One who can’t quite put his life together, and one who — in addition to his personal confusions, give-ups, and fall-aparts — feels his country wobbling around him and, finding neither remedy nor even meaningful response, flails about in useless fretting.
Here he is, Bartleby and Amble. Take him all and all, and he is a man like any other. A thoroughly typical specimen, since — according to your very own dogmas — at base we are all essentially the same. He needs help. Can you apply your ideas to his life so that he feels/thinks/acts wiser, better, kinder? Can you help him find a way forward? Can you help him meaningfully address the dilemmas that defeat him time and time again?
That is this project. A specific Applied Love project, tailored to one individual, but hopefully shedding light on the general question of how your beautiful notions can actually have a positive practical impact. Put your ideas to real use for real good in the real world!, why don’t ‘cha?
But how to proceed?
Come over here, sir. Step up this way. Show the world-renown Pure Love authorities where it hurts!
In your belly? At the pit of your gut? And you’re sure this is a spiritual, not a merely physical complaint? Hmmm. Arms up. Tongue out. Repeat after me: “Lovers love lest love leave lovers lonely.” Now twice as fast. And doubled again. And again. And … stop!
What do you think, Amble?
Nothing a little dogma can’t fix!
My professional opinion is likewise optimistic. Now, listen up, fellow. We’re going to give you a quick overview of Pure Love and Something Deeperism, and then we’ll set to work applying these hardy, all-weather, satisfaction-guaranteed dogmas to you specifically.
We’ll have to learn some more about him.
That’s right! Listen hear, man: We’re going to ask you questions and you’ll have to answer them as truthfully as possible.
Right, that’s later. Now listen to our doctrines: Pure Love and Something Deeperism.
But easy and quick — for laymen and other slouches.
Exactly! It is important that he — or, in you case you –, this poor specimen of broken hopes and derailed dreams — it is important that the patient understand the medicine.
Author: Bartleby Willard
Editor: Amble Whistletown
Copyright: Andrew M. Watson